Update: December 28th

So many small changes… after months of dragging around, but feeling increasingly like I’d acquired some sort of evening ADHD, I ended up back at my doc’s office. Not because I wanted to be there, but because it was the only way to get my prescription refilled. I suppose this is why they do that whole requirement.

Anyway, we discussed my depression/anxiety/hyperactivity and inability to sleep and he suggested the opposite of what I thought he would suggest.

First off, he said I should be off the Ambien! That surprised me, as Ambien has been the only way for me to sleep soundly through the snoring, thrashing and general huffing of my bedfellow. Instead, my doc upped my level of Lorazepam, and cut the Ambien dosage in half, with the goal of reducing it completely.

So I did as instructed and I do admit, on half the Ambien and 1.5 times the Lorazepam, I do feel better. I’m sleeping soundly, and though I’m still not getting to bed on time, I don’t feel as anxious. My moods are improved as well. Tonight I’m going to try 2mg of Lorazepam and NO Ambien. We’ll see how that goes.

My naturopath also put me on 50mg of 5-HTP at bedtime, which is probably helping too. She gave me some B6, multivitamins and fish oil, but I keep forgetting to take everything but the B6.

The days are getting lighter, which should also make a difference, and I’ve had two weeks off, which has improved my mood in myriad ways.  So all in all, everything feels a bit more hopeful, though it still hurts to type this.

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  1. I decided to try the lorazepam since you had said it worked for you. I can deal with my body being in rough shape and all, but unfortunately its not the same case for my mind. I decided to stop taking the lorazepam because it had stopped putting me to sleep after only one month, although the first few weeks were unbelievably amazing! I had also noticed that I was very, very unhappy, emotional and over all just mentally exhausted and unwell. My doc told me i needed to be weaned off and to break the pill in half over a six day period. Boy was he wrong.
    Its supposed to be done over 2-3 weeks and done in increments of fourths. Lorazepam detoxes can be as severe as heroin detoxes in some cases and the list of detox symptoms is never ending( wikipedia has a nice long complete list). I was a firey-hot and sweaty( i’m the queen of being cold), pessimistic crying mentally unstable, beyond exhausted insomniac on a whole new level. I thought I had known some bad insomnia, but i had no clue. I got desperate for sleep, but there was no way in hell that I was going to go on another drug that was going to make me feel like that again. I’m not sure if you have tried it or not, but i’ve recently started taking melatonin and it really works well for me! I had tried it previously, but wasn’t taking it correctly for myself (as opposed to those lucky “normal” people). I take 3mg tablets (its recommended to only take 1mg, but it doesn’t do the job) around 6-7pm and im usually asleep by 12-1am. It also seems to decrease my unconscious fighting urge to stay awake. For the days I forget to take the tablet at my usual times, i take a liquid gel tab by Nature Made which usually takes about two hours. In normal people, it seems that the melatonin kicks in much sooner. It as seems to have somewhat fixed my circadian rhythm, which is a miracle.

    Hope all is well with you! Spring is just around the corner. It’s always nice to have something like that to look forward to! 🙂


    • Gosh, Chloe, I’m sorry it was so rough. Lorazepam is certainly not for everyone, and doesn’t work for folks who don’t have this disease, in the same way that it does for me. I use it with very careful dosing from my doc. Some folks really don’t like it, I have heard.

      I never found melatonin to work, and given what the lorazepam is there to do (not make me sleep, but affect my nervous system), the melatonin just isn’t what I need. I know it works for a lot of folks though.

      Good luck!


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